under a bus with my fingers crossed.

Day 26 | Ain’t Misbehavin’ | But How ‘Bout a Fried Bologna Sandwich

How Sunday mornings used to be:

Head: heavy

Body: bloated

Music: Bossa Nova

Frying pan: eggs over easy, turkey bacon

Oven: home fries [“homes”], toast

Keurig: hazelnut coffee with yummy cream from a cow who’s utterly respected and nurtured

Dog: drooling

Cat: sitting on counter seeking scraps

Bunnies: Husband indulging with bits of fruit


How Sunday mornings are now:

Light in the head and body.

Bossa Nova Music (Karrin Allyson is a favorite)

2 servings of HMR vanilla shake

Coffee with HMR shake stirred in [yuck]

Dog and cat sleeping; bunnies have SADLY been re-homed due to unforeseen circumstances.

This is a sacrifice—the going-without.

Is it worth it?

And, why, did I dream of Soren Kierkegaard?

To Google, I go.

“Much of Kierkegaard philosophical work deals with the issues of how one lives as a ‘single individual,’ giving priority to concrete human reality over abstract thinking and highlighting the importance of personal choice and commitment.”

First the orange balloon, now this Danish dude Kierkegaard.

It’s another affirmation.

Manifested just for me.

Kierkegaard’s August 1, 1835 journal entry:

What I really need is to get clear about what I must do, not what I must know, except insofar as knowledge must precede every act. What matters is to find a purpose, to see what it really is that God wills that I shall do; the crucial thing is to find a truth which is truth for me, to find the idea for which I am willing to live and die.


One must first learn to know himself before knowing anything else. Not until a man has inwardly understood himself and then sees the course he is to take does his life gain peace and meaning; only then is he free of that irksome, sinister traveling companion — that irony of life, which manifests itself in the sphere of knowledge and invites true knowing to begin with a not-knowing (Socrates) just as God created the world from nothing.

Did Kierkegaard find his truth, I wonder?

No academic could answer this, but my inquiry seemed to derive an answer along these lines:

For Kierkegaard Christian faith is a matter of individual subjective passion, which cannot be mediated by the clergy or by human artifacts [I love this]. Faith is the most important task to be achieved by a human being, because only on the basis of faith does an individual have a chance to become a true self. This self is the life-work which God judges for eternity.

I’ve got to have faith—complete trust and confidence in the going-without—and watch for those little affirmations manifested along the way.

Thanks, Søren.




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